


Hunger

by GoldenHero



Series: Haikyuu Mental Hospital. [3]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Anorexia, Broken Families, Bulimia, F/F, M/M, Purging, Suicide Attempt, puking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-03
Updated: 2016-09-04
Packaged: 2018-08-12 19:05:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,228
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7945726
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GoldenHero/pseuds/GoldenHero
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tsukishima Kei witnessed his brother trying to kill himself.<br/>Oikawa Tooru wished that his best friend was really real.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

_ “I’m just not hungry today.”  _

 

_ Liar. _

 

_ “I already ate.”  _

 

_ Liar. _

 

_ “It must have been food poisoning.”  _

 

_ LIAR. _

 

_ “I really am okay.”  _

 

_ LIAR.  _

 

_ “Please, don’t worry about me.”  _

 

_ LIAR. _

 

_ “I’ll be fine! It’s just a diet.”  _

 

_ LIAR! _

 

_ **LIAR LIAR LIAR LIAR LIAR LIAR LIAR LIAR LIAR LIAR LIAR LIAR LIAR LIAR LIAR LIAR LIAR LIAR LIAR LIAR!!!!!!** _

 

**~~_“Kei, please, why did you lie to me?”_ ~~ **

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Kei snapped open his eyes, gasping softly as he woke up. He immediately groaned at the bright lights that glowed above him brightly, closing his eyes tightly and turning his head to the side. He tried to bring his arm up to his eyes but found that he could not move his arms. 

 

He opened his eyes again, careful not to look into the incredibly bright lights above him and started to look around the room he had been placed in. 

 

It was a plain white, with dull looking textures on the walls, gleaming lightly with the paint sheen. There was a small sitting chair in the corner, and although it was empty, there was a small backpack that was settled next to it. 

 

Kei’s backpack.

 

Nearly instantly, memories began to flow back into his head, all of the lies that he had told, the worried looks that Akiteru gave him when he insisted that he was fine, he, leaning over the toilet and throwing up until blood swirled in the water, tainting it a bright red. 

 

He closed his eyes tightly, pushing back the feelings of sickness in his stomach as he laid on the hard bed. This was it. Everyone knew now. They knew what he had been doing for almost four months now. 

 

He sighed through his nose. It was too late to be regretting what he had did, anything that would happen now was something that he had put onto himself. 

 

He listened as the door opened, and soon felt warm familiar hands touching his forehead. Akiteru. He thought, exhaling heavily through his nose, feeling Akiteru’s hand pause, as if stuttering in place. 

 

Neither of the brothers moved from their places, as if they were afraid to breathe in the presence of one another. It was terrifying. Kei hated it with all of his being. It had been this way before, when Kei had caught Akiteru in the bathroom, his wrists dripping with blood as he stood, quivering and shaking over the sink, the white stone already stained with blood. 

 

He hated this feeling. Because he knew that it would not last long, the confrontation soon was to arise, and Kei would have to go into that hell all over again. 

 

“Why?” Akiteru whispered, and Kei soon felt a cool drop fall onto his nose. He opened his eyes to see Akiteru above him, tears spilling steadily from his golden eyes as he stared down at Kei. Betrayal stuck heavily in his orbs, and even though Kei wanted to, he couldn’t look away. 

 

“Why did you hide for so long? I could have helped you! Why do you always insist on pushing me so far away?!” Akiteru asked through great sobs, holding onto Kei as if his younger brother was his only lifeline keeping him living and breathing. 

 

Kei simply stared at him, unable to speak as he watched the person that he trusted so much break down before him as he had done so many times before. Kei had many memories of this, seeing Akiteru crying was nothing really too unusual in some twisted messed up way. 

 

“Is...” Akiteru whispered, taking one of Kei’s hands. 

 

“Is it because I tried to kill myself?” 

 

Kei sucked in a sharp breath as unpleasant memories that he had pushed down rose up and buzzed through his mind like an angry wasp. He blinked quickly as tears filled his eyes, but soon enough, he was crying as well. 

 

Akiteru sobbed and picked up Kei’s horribly thin body, holding him close to his chest as the two brothers cried into one another's arms. Almost as if they were children. 

 

“I-it wasn’t your fault..” Kei choked, hiding his face in Akiteru’s heaving chest, “I just wanted to be good for you.” 

 

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Only a few minutes after, Kei found himself stirred from a sleep he didn’t even know he had started to slip into by small sticky fingers pressing onto his cheeks, and a soft push of breath splaying against his nose and cheeks. 

 

He mumbled, cracking open his eyes to see a small child on his chest. It looked up at him with large golden eyes, short fluffy hair, and a small pacifier in her mouth that was gently sucking on as the two siblings stared at one another.  

 

He didn’t listen as the doctor started to talk to his mother and Akiteru, instead, he stared at the new sibling that lay on his chest, and as he moved his long lanky arms a little, it giggled and patted his sunken in cheeks again. 

 

Almost as if he wasn’t lying in a hospital bed, nearly dead. 

 

Tears began to well up in his eyes as he thought back to what had happened so far that he knew. 

 

He had been out for nearly five months. Leaving his heavily suicidal brother with chronic depression and his mother who was having another child soon. A baby sister who he soon learned the name of Tsukishima Yukie. She was only a few months old, but already looked like a tiny Kei with her golden eyes and shaggy hair. He only got to see her once before the doctor ushered his mother from the room, taking the babbling baby with her.

 

Kei almost reached his arms after Yukie, but thought against it as the doctor cleared his throat before he started to speak to Kei. 

 

“Two collapsed lungs, anemia, your stomach tore itself open from the acids that you continued to throw up. Your throat is unrepairable. It’s amazing that you can still talk, but now, you’ll be put on a GED until it heals enough for you to eat again.” The doctor said, holding a clipboard and looking very official as he stared down at Kei. 

 

Kei stared back, blinking slowly as he nodded a little. His body felt sore, and he could feel multiple iv’s sticking out from his skin, dripping different fluids into his skeletal body in an effort to keep it alive. 

 

“On another note, I have spoken to your mother and brother prior,” the Doctor continued, a deep frown coming onto his face as he flipped the page over one before handing Kei a pink sheet of paper. 

 

As Kei took it to look it over, the Doctor continued, “they both agree that until you’ve proven to be stable enough to fully function in society, you’ll be placed in a Mental Facility that will help you regain weight, and heal your mental state.” 

 

Kei stared at the pink paper. The words on it seemed to float off the paper dreamily, and he soon found himself dropping the paper onto his lap and simply nodding, a blank stare going out at nothing in particular. 

 

“Okay..” He whispered after a few moments, not looking back up to the doctor. “Just please, let me see Yukie again..” He said, looking up at the Doctor who’s serious face soon softened. 

 

“Of course,” he said, smiling weakly. “I will make arrangements with your mother to meet your sister again in the near future.” Kei nodded, sighing in relief and falling backwards onto the bed, closing his eyes for a moment. 

  
“Thank you...” He mumbled, and soon, in his weakened light state, he once again fell asleep. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is short and crappy, I'm sorry.

When Oikawa was young, he thought he was invincible. 

 

It didn’t matter what other people thought, he just ignored their snide remarks and went on, believing in himself more than anyone in his life ever would. 

 

He believed in himself because of Iwaizumi Hajime. His best friend in the entire world. He told his mother about Hajime, but didn’t understand the troubled looks she gave Oikawa when she would point to Hajime who was clearly next to him. 

 

As he grew up, he realized something. No one could see Hajime. The thought he wasn’t real. He didn’t accept it, and talked to Hajime daily, asking for advice, or simply walking with him to school. 

 

But it wasn’t enough to stop the teasing. 

 

_ “ ~~Freak!”~~ _

 

~~_ “He talks to himself all the time! **What is up with that?!”** _ ~~

 

~~_ “So **weird...”** _ ~~

 

At first, Oikawa had tried to block out their voices, but over time, and as he got into high school, it soon became too much for him to bare any longer. He could feel all of their anger, disgust, could see the glare of his mother when she thought he couldn't see him, and the tears that she shed late at night, drinking booze to soothe her problems. 

 

He had to make himself normal again... He had to make that people liked him again, but then again, they never really did like him in the first place, did they? He needed to make his mom feel better, to make her love him again! He could do it! He had read about it online, something called  _Anorexia Bulimia,_ something that...It could cure him! That's what the voices in his head said! 

So now he found himself in this position, shoving fingers down his throat and letting the contents of his stomach fall into the bowl. His back muscles twitched as, he continued to purge into the bowl. He could sense that Hajime had appeared behind him, but ignored him.  

“Oi, what are you doing, Shittykawa?” Hajime asked as Tooru sat in front of the toilet, gagging as he puked into the bowl. He could feel Hajime stiffening up, and soon felt a strong hand on his back. Tooru looked backwards to Hajime, smiling crookedly with bile and puke on his chin. 

“Getting skinny..” He coughed, spitting bile from his mouth before sitting up and wiping his mouth. Hajime narrowed his eyes, frowning as Oikawa shoved his fingers down his throat once more, soon coughing up bile with traces of blood. That was when things turned for the worse...

Hajime grabbed Tooru by his shoulders, yanking him upwards and shoving him back so hard that his head hit the tile floor with a sickening 'THWACK!'. Tooru cried out in pain, stars shimmering before his eyes as he shook and shivered, trying to see again as Hajime straddled him, placing his hands on Tooru's throat. 

"You dumbass!" Hajime spat, pressing down hard on Tooru's neck, continuing to strangle him even as Tooru struggled, his hands passing through Hajime's form as if he was water. Tooru knew it as much as anyone else did, Hajime wasn't real. 

None of what was happening was real, but Tooru chose to see it as real. 

He choked as Hajime continued to choke him, snarling angrily in Tooru's face. "You will not to that!" He snapped, smacking Tooru on his cheek hard, causing Tooru to cry out in pain again, whimpering as Hajime roughly choked him harder. 

That was how his mother found him, lying on the floor of the bathroom with a puddle of blood around his head, his hands on his throat as he choked himself, sobbing in pain and pleading to someone who wasn't even there. 

* * *

 

Tooru's mother dragged him to the hospital, a group of nurses and doctors forcing him into a hospital room as Tooru screamed, still seeing Hajime's enraged face, and soon seeing the horrible faces and beings of his worse nightmares. They clawed as his skin as he was strapped down, they choked him and forced themselves into his body as he screamed, feeling non-existent blood dripping from multiple parts on his body. 

He screamed and screamed until his throat went raw, and he was spitting up huge slugs of blood, shaking and trembling as nightmares swirled around him, torturing him as Doctors and nurses tried to calm him down. 

But they never could..

Tooru was gone much too far into his mind. And even with Hajime forgiving him, by his side and holding him through his pain and fear. Tooru stayed like that, unable to think, unable to move, and soon enough, he had gone limp with all of the drugs and chemicals in his system, and even when he was allowed to go the bathroom, he threw up what was little in his stomach, and clawed lines into his stomach and arms, seeing the blood...And just letting it drain. 

It was all so terrible...For the long time that he had been in the hospital...He had heard the words  _Insanity,_ or  _Mental Hospital..._ It was all so confusing, Hajime didn't know, so Tooru didn't know. 

He let himself go, and as he was taken from the hospital and placed into a room with many soft pillows for him to lay on and snuggle into with Hajime. He was given medication, and soon, he started to go back to normal...

He never could be the same, and now, as he was in the hospital, his fate was in the hands of his mind, and the staff that pretended to love him unconditionally. And so, with Hajime protecting him and giving him hope, he let himself go, and quietly, carefully, tried to heal again..


End file.
